so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
What's grosser: using a dirty sex towel as an oven mitt? or using the oven to reheat superbowl bean dip for dinner?
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
Randomize