he thought i was a dude.
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Randomize
