i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
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