hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
I intend to get homeless drunk
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
Randomize