there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
I want her autograph on my taint
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
Randomize
