it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
How do I recover from singing "your body is a wonderland" on his voicemail?
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
Ladies don't puke and tell
I just matched with a taco on tinder. Dreams come true.
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
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