so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
I have two black x marks on my hands.
Yep you got cut off last night after a stripper bent over in front of you and you screamed very loudly 'I can see your soul from here'
damnit I wish I could remember that.
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
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