Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
and the officer said have you been drinking
and i said NOO SIR.
and he said, I am a woman.
I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
If I started a story with "That three-year-old totally deserved it," would you listen?
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
Randomize
