I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
Just used my cancer results to get a free lap dance. Great day just got better.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
Dress was in bathroom covered in shards of glass, earrings on living room floor, bracelet still missing, purse in backyard. The cast of Princess Bride all left the bar to make sure I was ok. Perfect night
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
I'm prostituting myself for tickets to Disney World. There's a contradiction there.
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
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