lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
pouring popcorn down my shirt before we went to the bar was the best idea ever. it was delicious and convenient.
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
not only did u rap a voicemail to me last night.... but it lasted so long that it cut you off so you called back to finish..... never do this again
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