Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
Actually I more feel like I'm on a ship about to grab the holy grail off an island
The ship is me being high the holy grail is some profound idea I'm about to have
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
Randomize
