About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
You turned to me, winked, whispered "man the harpoons" and walked out with the fat chick
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
Randomize
