Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
I got drunk and threw up on a kid at the amusement park. I think they're pressing charges.
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
I'm eating cold pizza from work and drinking beer from a wine glass trying to decide if I want to shower or just rub one out and go to sleep. How have I ever gotten laid?
Because you're really hot before taking the time to actually get to know you.
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