do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
Opening beer with my teeth is getting easier the drunker I become.
It turns out my teeth are bleeding.
PUB CRAWL IS THE WEEK I COME BACK FROM NOLA OMG OMG OMG. Has it been a year already since I tried to make out with you and you let a bar tender take a shot out of your cleavage? Time flies.
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
I need mimosas to revive my soul
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Randomize
