You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
You're the Michael Phelps of my vagina. Most decorated Fuckolympian of all time.
Am I going to be on condom boxes?
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
No one knows how to work that "I pulled a muscle in my leg" drunk swagger like you can
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize
