If i come over, it means nothing
Welp...herpes.
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Okay the common myth about putting tampons in you nostrils for a nose bleed is busted. It just starts coming out through your throat.
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
Woke up this morning naked, wrapped in a bath mat with a wad of singles on the table. I'm calling it a win.
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
I'm literally trapped as the little spoon on a mattress on the floor of an unfinished basement with a professional athlete snoring in my hair
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
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