Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
I woke up at 7am naked in my bathtub with the shower running. My apartment was so full of steam that my ceiling was dripping. Who thought it would be okay for me to get my own place, anyway?
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
He called me a "functional alcoholic" like its a bad thing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
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