Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
I want to play lord of the rings tonight. And by that I mean get really drunk, potentially lost, and go trekking through the woods or climbing shit. I want all of you there. You are the fellowship. This is a mass text. I am insanely high.
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
If the fate of the world hinged on some chubby girl getting laid, the president would dispatch me with a fifth of Jameson immediately and then rest easy.
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
he left a full can of coors light underneath my windshield wiper, like a love note. if that's not husband material, i don't know what is
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
Randomize
