I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
My phone has started autocorrecting "monogamy" to "monogamish"
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
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