Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
Randomize
