there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
11:30 you texted me saying he was on his way. 11:37 you said, "Oh my God that was terrible."
Randomize
