porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
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