he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep
yeah i got into a fight with my man last night
why can't men just shut up and put out?
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
They're letting me teach a freshman-laden class now. This university needs better background checks.
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
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