well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
Randomize
