marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
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I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
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I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
Last night was a sign that I need to stop sleeping with any girl that can quote the mighty ducks
Specially the ones that look like Goldberg
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