I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
He was so traumatized by the It's a small world ride but he immediately pulled out a flask from god-knows-where and got drunk before the ride was over. The ride operator didn't blame him.
Randomize
