hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
We need to rekindle our bromance
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
I asked my boss to leave early for a booty call. She said yes. See.... everyone sees it's important I get laid.
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
Sara can't come to the phone right now. She's currently having an in-depth conversation with a flower pot.
Does it look too obvious if I buy wine and candles!?! In my defense there is a gigantic snow storm coming.
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