im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
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