Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
Bro I can't jerk it to my phone anymore. I feel Siri staring back, and she's real disappointed.
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
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