Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
I accidentally requested the ides of march off instead of st patricks day. Is this an omen? will alcohol be my brutus?
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
Rule number one to being a good adult: don't use your vagina as an icebreaker. Just some wisdom I thought I'd pass down from experience.
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
Randomize
