Are we in a gay sports bar?
No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
My bed smells like the plague
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
Randomize