I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
my fingers and penis are no longer on speaking terms. My penis is too jealous of where my fingers get to go.
She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
i woke up next to a ladle and a packet of chocolate biscuits that my face had melted into one giant biscuit.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
Randomize
