found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
I feel like my vagina stays drunk longer than the rest of me. It's always super sensitive and hungry the day after drinking.
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
Purse pizza: the pizza you buy before the club, and you eat on the train home. I thought you knew me by now!
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
