final count. 18 beers. 4 shots baileys. 2 shots vodka. 1 glass champagne. vomited in the yard after losing my phone in a field for 8 hours. Possibly played tag with myself
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
I would makeout with my roommate, but im not drunk enough and she doesnt like bacon fat
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
Randomize
