Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
The next time you try to drunkenly strip me in public let's make sure it's not anywhere near the daiquiri factory or a group of police officers.
I desperately wanted to wear your shirt.
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
I'm wearing sunglasses around my house. Douchebag status. The hangover is real.
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
On a scale of 1 to hungover I’m definitely throwing up at the office today.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize