is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
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