ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
You don't know happiness until you've got to smoke weed inside taco bell and then eat all you want for free
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