Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
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What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
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