Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
I'm inventing beer flavored vodka. This raspberry shit makes me feel like a pussy.
He was probably pissed, but i couldn't tell for sure. How pissed can someone really look while holding a fishbowl mimosa?
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
This year I'm going to try NOT getting arrested. I think the 30th birthday is the cutoff for calling Mom to bail me out.
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
The Internet Is Obsessed With This Stripper Who Dropped It Low Just To Eat A Slice Of Pizza
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?