I overheard a kid saying to his mom at Walmart: "Mommy.. should we buy cups for daddy's spit?"
I was just told by a cop that my party was the most epic party they ever crashed
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
Go christen that room with your naked body.
The hardest part about being a child of divorce is when you're at your dad's house but your condoms are at your mom's house.
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
Randomize