I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
I ended up staying at a police station for being a witness in a public masturbation case..NOW do you believe me that I've never had a good St. Patrick's Day?
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
She said my new name was "ranch" because I "looked delicious"
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
I'm laying here half naked telling him I'm eating gold fish to change the subject of hookin up cuz I don't wanna put pants on
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
He got in a fight. Then called me drunk to see if he should bail his friends out, or walk through a Taco Bell drive-thru. True love.
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
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