hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
I almost had sex at the fire station last night and I need you to acknowledge all the awesomeness that is in that sentence.
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
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