Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
we got kicked out of McDonald's because you kept screaming THAT SHIT CRAY at the woman in front of us because she ordered a fish filet.
...that shit cray.
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
I passed out drunk in her bed. Her boyfriend showed up and told me to go to the other room or we were gonna have a threesome. I threw up off the side of her bed and left. I feel like that was an adequate response.
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
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