im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
There can only be one screw up per family and I was here first. Get your shit together bro
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
Hey, thanks for not calling the cops when I answered the door naked, high as fuck, and covered in red velvet cake batter.
Only good thing about the 50 Shades is that it is now completely OK to call a credit card co to dispute the charge for nipple clamps that didnt arrive.
Randomize
