Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
Btw I definitely had pizza sauce on my face, a painful hickey on my neck, and I just remember screaming SISTER WIVES because of the girl's 1997 jean skirt! Wow.
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
Randomize
