spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
Drunk is a universal language darling
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
Randomize
