if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
Please don't be alarmed by the blood on my arms and phone in the morning. It's not mine.
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
Randomize
