I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
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