I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
Why is half of me covered in green stuff that won't come off?
You stripper-danced on a light pole in the quad. It had fresh paint on it.
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
These 23 People Had The Most Insane Spring Breaks Ever
She didn't know my name but she knew I was Canadian so she just called me Canada. It sounded like the national anthem when we were fucking.
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
25 Women On How They Let Their Oblivious Partners Know They Want To Bone
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
Randomize
