ADVERTISEMENT

• (732): View more from New Jersey

  You look like a girl that would like strip clubs

  Fav 17 2918 1070

  share tweet
  

• (803): View more from South Carolina

  you left a giant bottle of vodka in my room from last night. does this serve as a parting gift or hush money?

  Fav 18 6094 957

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (443): View more from Maryland

  He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid

  Fav 18 3577 1458

  share tweet
  

• (520): View more from Arizona

  I am the master of subtle flirting. I seduced him by simulating a hand job with an epi-pen during training.

  Fav 15 4805 1333

  share tweet
  
• 

  19 Characteristics That Make People Instantly Attractive

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (516): View more from New York

  Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads

  Fav 2 2974 1093

  share tweet
  

• (619): View more from California

  Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.

  Fav 21 3000 1525

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (817): View more from Texas

  Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.

  Fav 6 3344 1027

  share tweet
  

• (206): View more from Washington

  college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars

  Fav 9 1738 1085

  share tweet
  

• (425): View more from Washington

  i'm going to invent a mini fridge that can hang from faucets so i don't have to get out of the bathtub anymore for a cold beer. its a million dollar idea

  Fav 8 1637 771

  share tweet
  
• 

  25 People Confess What They’re Shamefully Attracted To

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (254): View more from Texas

  I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look

  Fav 4 1102 764

  share tweet
  

• (403): View more from Alberta, CA

  Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....

  Fav 0 594 902

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (253): View more from Washington

  First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere

  Fav 0 862 572

  share tweet
  

• (270): View more from Kentucky

  Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.

  Fav 1 504 402

  share tweet
  

• (631): View more from New York

  LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok

  Fav 0 339 178

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (909): View more from California

  the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe

  Fav 0 7 28

  share tweet
  

Randomize