i opened her purse and found 4 bottles of vodka tampons and an unopened box of birth control...
You were so high at Ikea last night that you were convinced you could speak Swedish. The whole the time you were our navigator and when we got to the cashier you were hitting on the lady. When she gave you her number you told her you were saving her number as Inglfurfta cuaue she must be swedish since she works there.
I'm so hungover even the car commercials make me nauseas
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It really went downhill when you started writing IOU on pieces of napkins. Giving them to the strippers
Real life dumb and dumber
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
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