So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
He wants another date...I mean he's cute, but I just am not ready to give up my glamorous single-girl lifestyle here.
you mean the one where you drink out of the carton and don't wear pants?
Yeah, and pee with the door open. It's the little things.
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
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