Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
Why is your signature on my underwear?
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
Randomize
