i wish peter jackson would direct porn
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I jerked off enough times today to safely commit to the fact that im not getting laid tonight
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
If he knew how badly I want to blow him he’d stop talking about his wife
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
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